Jul 27, 2011

Complexity


The solution to a good depression for me is probably cleaning my moms kitchen...the oil, spices and the magical ingredients required to make curries do have its long term greasy effects on the stoves, and oven and the kitchen in general...a good scrubbing, wiping, moping and polishing everything to make them shine does help one deviate from current stress related thoughts to a stressful cleaning...scrub your stress away...it is the same old monotonous dialogue of mine...I dont know what I am suppose to do with my life...I think I have some options but they keep shutting themselves on my face and then I have to barely make it again and get on another path and start from scratch and after a few seasons scratch that and start again...Its not really helping me get anywhere...and everyone keeps telling me I am suppose to be somewhere in life...it has become very difficult for me to focus on anything and really put set my mind to it...options sometime confuse people rather than giving them choices for a better deal...I wish I had an algorithm to calculate opportunity cost...and a magic dice that I would roll to decide what I should do next...there are so many things I dont understand...there are so many things I feel are unfair and so many things I would like to complain about...but unless I find solutions for them myself no one seems to care...I am not really enjoying life being so mysterious with me but again living is a complexity in itself...

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